Thursday, August 24, 2006

3 conversations with strangers.

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Conversation #1:
Lila and I come upon a group of dog owners and their dogs at the park. The dog owners are friendly, and the dogs seem small and harmless, so we venture for a closer look. A middle aged woman with a small schnauzer says to Lila, "This is Sophie!"
Lila: "Sophie baby dog."
Woman: "Well, no actually, she's about five."
Lila: "Sophie have penis?"
Woman: "No, actually, Sophie doesn't have...a penis."
Lila: "Sophie have penis?"
Woman: "No-"
Lila: "Sophie have vagina!"
[Uncomfortable silence as the woman seems to determine she doesn't want to continue with this conversation.]
Me: "Let's go watch the tennis players, Lila."


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Conversation #2
Lila and I are at a nearby mall that has a fish pond and a fountain. We are sitting watching the fish, when an older man wheels his chair-bound elderly father next to us. The man greets us, and starts to talk to his father about the fish. Lila points to the younger man and says loudly, "man have vagina? Dat man have vagina? DAT MAN HAVE VAGINA?" We move away quickly before any eye contact can be made.


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Conversation #3
We are at the bookstore, reading an Elmo book. A store employee comes over and says, "Oh, do you like Elmo? I love Elmo! He's so cute!" Lila responds, "Elmo have vagina." I smile wanly, and the employee backs away.


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